Not as easy as they look

Some things look nice and easy. They fool you. They lull you into a false sense of security. You think you can do it, then BAM... The realisation hits you, that you might not able to. You might not be any good. People will think badly of you.

But it's not your fault.

It's the glossy pictures. The smiling faces of the people who CAN do it. The TV programmes.

Yep, those celebrity chefs have a lot to answer for.

I'm talking about cooking. About following a simple recipe. Because, you see, I can follow one to the letter and STILL GET IT WRONG.

Part of my anti-laziness campaign is to learn to cook. My current culinary repertoire includes: two pasta dishes, chilli (and a damn good one - thank you Good Food), chicken or beef casserole and toad in the hole. Oh, and sandwiches.

Not a massive list if I'm honest.

I read a lot of blogs and when people write food posts, they make it look glam. Everything looks easy and it all turns out right. Right, well I'm going to write about what ACTUALLY happens.

This weekend I tried a curry. A Jamie Oliver curry (I'd link but it's on the Recipes app). I've tried it before and it was nice and spicy and a big hit. This weekend, not so much.

Cooking the rice... So you need to cook the cumin seeds etc in the hot oil. WHAT HAPPENED: they exploded. Popped ALL OVER THE KITCHEN. we're still finding them on the walls.

Garlic... I love garlic. I do not like stinking of it for 3 days because I had to grate it.


Meat: I hate raw chicken. That's my fault, not the recipe's.

You're supposed to be able to cook the curry at the same time as the rice. Yeah right. Good luck with that. It took aaaages.

Spices: I used loads of spices. There was no flavour. I have no idea if I burnt them, didn't cook them long enough or they were just plain dull.

At least it looked like the picture. Sort of.

I also used EVERY Utensil/spoon/gadget in the kitchen. We barely had plates to eat off, and it looked like a bomb had hit it.

This happens every time I cook. I can't instinctively follow a recipe, I just don't get food. I'm not dissing Jamie Oliver, I think he's great - the first time I made it it was fine. Why did it not taste right this time?

Anyway... The cake I made on Sunday was much better. Not sure how I managed to sugar in my hair though.